A Princess Thing

I was talking to a guy the other day who told me he was dating a girl he thought he likes, but she has a really shrill voice.

He explained at first he thought he could negotiate it, however, when they got into a heated discussion her voice became exasperating, and it was at this point he began to doubt his ability to over look it.

Sure its true when you are getting along there are those little things that become exaggerated when your not getting along, yet I got the feeling her voice wasn't just one of those things. For me the things that bug me at the beginning never decrease over time, for me those things only get worse.

In my twenties and early thirties I dated quite a bit, and inevitably I would see something on that first date which told me a second date should not take place, but I would find myself 6 months down the line completely focused on whatever it was on the first date I found only slightly annoying to be the reason I would not be sure I could ever be in her company again.

I also dated girls I had nothing in common, and although some people think opposites attract, the truth is opposites become a pain in the ass within 6 weeks.

One time I dated a girl who was a self described "river rat". She had the look, long over processed permed hair, she always seemed like she needed a good scrubbing, her clothes seemed to be about 1/2 size too small, and she drank Coors Light out of a can.

I have never been, nor do I ever plan to go to "The River".

On the first date she told me she didn't think she really liked attorneys, as she found them to be opportunistic and generally immoral.

I remain unsure why it was I went on the second date in this particular case, but in retrospect I think it may have been I thought she was really funny- but she wasn't trying to be. Although born and raised in Bellflower for some reason she had an accent which made it sound as though she was from Arkansas or Oklahoma, not quite from Texas, but just adjacent.

So she had a Jet Ski that was pink and on the back she had the following:

"Its a Princes Thing"

I still think about it.

It seems to me that riding any water bike is very unprincess like. We dated for the summer, and it wasn't until the very end I told her how I really felt about the statement on the back of her hot pink Jet Ski.

"Its fucking stupid. If you were really a "princess" you wouldn't be riding a Jet Ski ,you would be riding on a yacht. By virtue of you owning a Jet Ski, that isn't on the deck of a boat, you have defined yourself as NOT a princess. That is something you put on a big ass boat, not a flipping Jet Ski," I said.

I know it may sound harsh, but I felt justified based on her comment as to her assessment of lawyers.

Unfortunately, the mediocre first date, turned into a terrible second date. There was a rebound to not horrible on the third date, and for whatever reason a few weeks later I found myself in her condo in Stanton essentially telling her she was a moron.

"Get out of my house," she said suddenly sounding like she was from Bellflower and not Little Rock.

I wanted to be petty and say something like - sure, when you have one and I visit it I will, but I didn't. I left and never looked back.

So a few years later I get a call from her that she needed some legal advice about a family law matter and was I still practicing that area of the law.

Since I never practiced family law, and I still thought she was an idiot, I never returned the call and it it left me feeling as though I got the last word - seven years later.