Happiness

Recently while arguing about something I truly can not recall, Gioconda told me being married to a man is the same as being married to a woman.

So this means either, she's right, it is the same - or that she married the wrong person twice.

I mean, a mistake feels like a mistake - right?

So there's that.

Either way it got me to thinking about it, does everyone end up in the same place, in the end are most marriages more the same than different?

Candidly I don't know that many happy married people, but I'm not sure that they were happy single people- so theres no real control group. And really, other people don't "make" us happy, yet I find other people can make me really miserable....

Thinking back at my life thus far I can't tell you when I was happiest.

I've been more tired than I am now, certainly much more intense, but happier...maybe. Recently I told someone I whose opinion I trusted that I thought 99% of the problems of my life could be solved with money.

"You think it would solve your problems but I won't," she said.

Although I do think that she may know what she is talking about I'm just not certain I believe her. I remain convinced money can solve problems, more specifically my problems, and in turn I would be happy...or at least that is how it works in my head.

But I do know that nothing is ever what you think it is going to be, for me things are rarely more terrible than I imagined, because I tend to be worse case scenario right off the bat, but there are those times things turn out to be really great just in a different way. ..and I like that the best- terrific in a way I had never planned...

I guess happiness is not a destination, but a process.

But I'll continue to play lotto...